Friday, July 20, 2007

Here's where it gets a little preachy...

No regrets.

There are always ups and downs in life but for a long time I have tried to make this my mantra. The reasoning is logical. At any given point in your life, you make decisions based on what you feel is best. The result may not always turn out the way you hoped or things change along the way and your decision from before does not appear so wise now. However you do the best with what information you have. That is why it is important to have trustworthy friends to talk things over, mentors to give advice and loved ones to give moral support.

After having a talk with the roommate last night about his current dilemmas, I realize that my mantra needs to be expanded upon. It's not enough just to have no regrets because in some ways you can assume that every decision you made was right. Alternatively, even if your decisions are wrong and in turn you suffer the consequences, by simply having no regrets, it somewhat waives your responsibilities for the situation, putting the blame on an outside force. One can then easily be trapped in a vortex of complaints and dread for the unfairness of life, allowing himself to be victim to everything that ever goes wrong. The "victim" can then digress even further, withdrawing from healthy interaction with all situations and people. Essentially giving up because what is the point in trying? The unfairness of the world will ultimately put him in his place despite his best efforts. But it's okay as long as it's not his fault, he will never have to admit his wrongs to feel guilt or see the truth behind his choices, yet he will never be happy either.

No regrets. No complaints. No excuses.

Here is the addition which I believe completes this mantra. The first part remains the same but the second and last part kind of go together. Aside from not regretting the choices in the past, one must be grateful for what you have now. You must not complain and put the blame on others for your misfortunes because you are the single most powerful force in your universe. Sometimes those outside forces are pretty strong too but you alone can change how you interact, deal with or shape your future. To achieve that, you must not make excuses for why you cannot change your ways. You cannot make excuses to relieve responsibility of yourself. To have no regrets means to understand and admit your mistakes, then take matters into your own hands and change how it's done in the future. This makes for a true learning experience that will ultimately improve life and open doors for opporunity.

1 comment:

F_CKnuT said...

Only 2 days after my rant about the mantra to live by, I am faced with the difficulty of carrying it out. Time for some thinking and meditating.